My story is really awkward and hard to exsplain, its almost as if i
imagined tho horrble event. When i was around 14 i was at a superbowl
party and a few people were sneaking some beers from the paretns including
me. I had gotten angry ealier because i walked in on my boyfriend
cheating on me with a friend of mine, so i started flirting with my X to
make my boyfriend at the time jealous. I dint know what it would lead to.
I started flirting and stole his hat of his head because he said he was
having a bad hair day. He was chasing me all over the basement and
followed me into the bathroom where he said if i didnt give him his hat he
would rape me. I htough he cant mean it thats so stupid. But i tried
to run outta the gbathroom and he grabbed me and pushed me against the
walla dn proceeded to feel me up. I dropped the hat and stumbled out of
the bathroom because i was in such shock. I tried to get into the
garage where everyone was hangin out but he grabbed me from behind and coverd my mouth-dragging me into a near by bed room where he threw mwe
on to the bed. He started unbubklin his pants and i knew what he was
gonna try and do. He got on top of me and started hitting me and trying
to get my clothes of but luckily someone walked in and he got scared
and stopped. I never thought it would catch up to be in an odd way
later.
I was dating this guy and one night i got angry and messed things up
between us. I was now 16 and a junior in High school. He started datin
a freshman and i got really angry and said i was gonna beat her up but
i didnt really mean it. (Girl thing) So he got scared and was telling
his friend matt about it. The next day at school Matt harassed me
following me all around school. (the guy i was dating didnt know he was
doing this) Then one day i was on the computer and he said id regret if i
touched that freshmen girl. The nect day after school my doorbell
rang(im always home alone after school) And it was him he forced himself
inside my apatment. i ran up the stairs and said i woudl press charges if
he didnt leave but he kept coming at me and i tried to get in my bedroom
and lock the door but he was to fast. he pushed me on the bed and raped
me...the whole time he was saying this was my warning and i was a slut
who liked it anyways. This was only a few days ago and i havent told anyone i thought this way we be a good way to break the ice.
i am a nineteen year old woman who is mentally and emotionally messed
up. probably due to the fact that i was raped and my upbringing wasnt
too great. i was raped when i was 12 years old. here goes: i was going to
junior high school and this girl "jamie" ,whom i have never hung out
with, started being my friend and we started hanging out. she asked me to
come over to spend the night and i accepted. we hung out all day and
had a good time. she said she wanted us to sneak out later that night
after her parents had gone to bed to see her boyfriend "ron". i said ok. i
figured we would only be out for a couple of hours tops. well ron
called right before we were getting ready to leave and he said he was
bringing a friend "david". jamie looked at me and told me and i said ok as
long as she doesnt leave me ALONE with this person. i made her promise me
and she did. we went to this secluded partially wooded area behind her
house to meet them. we got there and sat around a little fire they had going. everyone started drinking. i had maybe a half a beer cuz
i hate that stuff. they all were just drinking beer after beer. even my
friend jamie.ron and jamie were making out practically the whole time
and david wasnt even sitting near me so i relaxed myself a little bit
and thought everything was gonna be ok. we were sitting there for quite a
while and someone just said hey lets go to davids house. so i asked
jamie if she thought that was a good idea and she said we wont be there
too long. i had a bad feeling cuz i knew jamie and ron were wanting to
have sex. and that meant i would have to be alone with this guy. at the
time i was only 5 foot 2 and approximately 100 lbs. this guy was well
over 6 foot tall and pretty darn close to 200 lbs. that in itself made me
a nervous wreck. me and david were walking behind jamie and ron. out of
nowhere he throws his arm around me and makes me face him then he jams
his tongue down my throat. i was so discusted. i pulled away and he was like what is your problem. i told him i didnt know him and i
dont feel comfortable just kissing a stranger. he blew me off and laughed
like it was nothing. we finally got to his house and went to the
basement. there was furniture and a tv and stuff down there so we all sat
down and turned the tv on. jamie and ron started their stuff again and my
worst thoughts had been confirmed. david asked me if i wanted to come
to his room and listen to the radio since jamie and ron were about to
have sex. i reluctantly said ok. when we got in his room i immediately
sat on his dresser. trying to stay as far away from his bed as possible.
i lit up a cigarrette and just sat there basically looking at the
floor. i felt so uncomfortable. he was being really nice and we just started
talking and stuff. then when i was about half way through my cigarrette
he took it out of my hand and threw it out the window behind me and
literally picked me up off the dresser and was just laughing and he threw me on his bed. i was mortified. he jumped on top of my little
self and tried kissing me and feeling me. all the while i just kept
thinking 'this is how i am going to lose my virginity'. i put both of my
hands on his chest and began pushing up as hard as i could to get him off
of me. but he didnt even budge an inch. it was like he didnt even notice
me trying to get him off of me. all of a sudden, penetration. i had
never felt such intense pain in my life. i could literally feel myself
being ripped open. i cried and yelled and he thought it was out of
pleasure. i remember looking up at the clock radio on his headboard and 3
hours went by. i basically went numb but i could still feel twinges of pain
in my stomach and my vagina. he wouldnt stop at all, and then there was
a knock on the door. ron and jamie stepped in and turned on the light.
never had i seen such horror on someones face. i made eye contact with
ron and jamie and mouthed the words 'help me'
'help me' 'help me'. then i looked down at my brand new white bra and
it was completely red from my own blood. i had blood all over my hands
and face and it was in my hair. i just couldnt believe it. and i know
ron and jamie had to of seen it. but to my astonishment, they turned
around, shut off the light and and shut the door behind them as they left.
my heart just dropped. david told me to get up and get dressed because
he thinks i might have woken up his dad and his sister who were just 1
and 2 doors down. the nerve of this guy. i could hardly move let alone
walk, but i managed to get dressed and walk to jamies. we were all
walking and he tried to kiss me again, as if nothing had happened. i just
told him not to touch me and to stay away. they walked us half way and
turned around and went home. when we got into jamies house, i
immediately lay on her bed. she came over to me and looked down at me and asked
"oh my god "marcy" are you ok?" all i could do was cry and say "you promised me you wouldnt leave me" she undressed me and brought me to
the bathroom and gave me a shower. i couldnt hardly hold myself up. she
then put pajamas on me and laid me down. she then put all my clothes in
the washing machine and started it. even though my bra was washed it
was still stained red. the next morning i called my mom to pick me up
early and on the way home i wanted to tell her so bad what had happened
but i couldnt. we just went on home like it was another day. she even
asked me what happened to my bra. and i said i got my period. i still have
not told her, im afraid she wont believe me. and i still dont know how
to handle it within myself. if someones out there that can help, i
would greatly appreciate it. thank you for reading my story.....
Marcy
AIM:bobbymcgee420 / MSN:corona654321
hi my names g. i'm 16 at the time of the rape i was 15 years old i
was u could say quite cautious never going out alone or alone with
anyone in a room so i was pretty aware things like these could happen.
anyway my parents had to leave for a month or so my moms mother was
really sick she was in icu and suffering from very low b.p so we had some
very close family friends known them for years they had three sons an
one of em the oldest his name was ali i sorta used to like him i mean he
was nice always ready to help real sweet guy with blue eyes ,dark
hair.so we(me my brother 20, younger brother 5 were at home watching tv an
all the usual things we do my brother had to go to meet a friend
somewhere he left me and my brother home with specific instructions not to
open the door to anyone (no one!)a short while after he left i heard the
door bell ring and thaught who the hell is it this time was watching a
tom cruise movie i looked through the keyhole saw him oo a. i thaught
cool! wow but wait a sec what does he want ? i was a nervous idiot
opened the door forgetting wut my elder brother told me let him in said hi
he looked strange i mean i thaught something was really wrong with the guy he was eyeing me from head to toe i wore a long maroon skirt
with the same type of shirt anyway he just kept smiling at me not really
telling me any reason fer this sudden visit.after long moment of
silence as if he were thinking something a plan probably (the bastard!!)he
finally asked me if he could use the phone we had two phones in my
parents room one in mine i let him use mine cause my younger brother had just
fallen asleep so i just didnt want him to wake up already he'd been
irritating me the whole day ,anyways after he was finished with the phoen
he called out to me i was in the kitchen goin mad thinking wut to talk
to him bout? hearing my name i quickly ran to my room looked around and
couldnt see him the bastard was behind the door ! and dint really come
out till i went further into my room he just quickly shut and locked
it, i turned around i was taken by surprise "wut are you doing a" i
said in such a tiny voice well hey he was real tall to u know and older than me 20 something o and did i tell u married too.immediately a
terrible feeling came tingling inside me umm ali? i kept saying backing
away from him he just kept smiling by the time i fell over on the bed i
was scared out of my mind he was sooo calm taking my wrists and kissing
them at this point i began screaming at him he just told me to shut up
or he'll wake my l'il brother up and bring him in to see him raping me,
so i did shutup but as he tore my clothes off i kept crying telling him
he had a wife,this isnt right ,i'm scared! plz lsiten to me ali wut if
i get pregnant suddenly he just looked up at me smiled and said don't
worry i'll take care of u.i started crying again trying to struggle with
him trying to push his chest off of me really getting frustrated that i
couldnt move him an inch he just kept laughing and said stop crying
child tears wont help u ,i'll never forget those words oh god i thaught
he's going to take away my virginity plz stop him stop him!!.he just pulled my legs apart and shoved it in me i cried out real loud it
hurt so much he just wouldnt stop kept goin fer and hour when he
finally finished i felt sore curling up in a ball and crying he then grabbed
my leg pulled me under him and told me he'd kill me if i told then
just got up and left it thaught i havent done anything to deserve this i
still remeber the bloody sheets so much blood i thaught my virginity
gone.......i hurt so much more mentally than physically before my brother
got home which i think was 1 in the night i showered twice washed dried
the sheets and went to sleep.
now i dont know wut to do it happened just three days before my 16th
birthday
right know my heads really hurting i'm feeling dizzy so i'll stop now
and tell u the rest later cause i guess i'm just not ready or strong
enough thx for listening to me,
sweetheart
